25 Years of Research Reveals #1 Most Valuable Gift We Can Give

Looking for the Best Gift to Give Someone you Care About?  

A 25 year research study reveals the #1 answer.  

Researchers and physiologist Dinkmeyer and Losoncy  followed the lives of couples and families for 25 years and their conclusion concurred with that of eminent psychiatrist Rudolf Dreikurs. 

Encouragement is the key ingredient for success
in all positive professional and personal relationships.

Of the myriad of things parents & partners did, trying to help their children & each other, Encouraging words created the best outcome in their child’s and their partners life.

Mastering the skill of using encouraging words 

is one of the greatest gifts you can offer to the people in your life.

First, it’s critical that you are clear on exactly what encouragement is:

• Encouragement is positive feedback that focuses primarily on effort or improvement rather than outcomes.
• Encouraging happens through valuing and accepting others as they are, having a belief in the innate capacity of people to overcome the challenges of life.
• Encouragement is recognizing, accepting, and conveying faith in another for the mere fact that he or she exists. They do not have to be “the best” to be a full-fledged human being.  Your focus and comments are such that you help them see their assets, strengths, resources and potential -- in contrast to their deficits, weaknesses and limitations.
• Encouragement requires dropping the urge to analyze what’s really going on or trying to solve the situation for another. It is about sharing your confidence in them and helping them regain their sense of perspective and confidence in their ability to get through and rise above life’s challenges.

You will discover that a word of Encouragement during a time when someone feels they have failed is worth more than an hour of praise after a victory.

Here are a few examples of Encouraging words.

• I believe in you.
• I know you did your best.
• You can make it.
• While everything didn't come off as you had hoped, I felt your effort and it's all going to work out.
• I can see you have made progress.
• Knowing you, I’m sure you will do well.
• You can only learn by trying and I feel like you always give a great effort.
• I can see you have really thought this through.
• That’s a challenge and I’m confident you’ll make it.

For additional details on using Encouraging words, download the Free e-book 

“Being The Shift” at www.BeingTheShift.com  

Like our Facebook page https://www.facebook.com/BeingTheShift

References

Dinkmeyer, D., & Losoncy, L. (1996). The skills of encouragement. Delray Beach, FL: St. Lucie Press.

Dreikurs, R. (1971). Social equality. Chicago: Alfred Adler Institute.

Add This One Thing to Your Celebration to Make it the Best Holiday Season Ever

While you are Giving Thanks & Connecting with those you care about this Holiday Season, learn to add Acknowledging to the Appreciation you express and witness amazing shifts start to happen.

From Being the Shift by Steve Stay

Acknowledging is recognizing and expressing specific appreciation for the value you personally receive from other's words or actions. 

To Acknowledge is to expand on the Appreciation by stating specifically how you feel you have personally benefited from the other persons words or actions. “It feels good to know that you are interested in and value my perspective”, rather than only saying: “Thank you” or “I appreciate you”.

Acknowledging is about YOUR feelings.  Without adding Acknowledging, your expression of Appreciation turns into Praise.  Praise is about judging their behavior as good or bad, right or wrong. 

Try “It feels so great to see you”, rather than a loaded Praised filled comment like, “Whoa, you look so great!”

This is one time it needs to be all about you, sharing how you feel you have benefited emotionally from the relationship and not your opinion of the other person's words or behavior.

Here are some other examples of Acknowledgments for this Holiday Season:

-    I love how I feel when I’m around you.

-    There are few people I can really pour my heart out to....thanks for being one of them.

-    My life feels better because you are a part of it.

-    I appreciate how you smile when I enter a room.  It helps me feel valuable.

-    I cannot quit smiling when you are around.  Thanks!  I love that feeling.

-    Thank you for allowing me to be a part of your life; it brings me so much joy.

-    Thank you, I can feel/sense your interest/energy/concern/warmth

-    I love watching you play/sing/dance/laugh/share/help others/read/cook/love our children

-    I love who you are, you help me feel safe/joyful/better about myself/excited about life

For a more detailed description on Acknowledging, download the Free e-book “Being The Shift” at www.BeingTheShift.com  Like our Facebook page https://www.facebook.com/BeingTheShift